Fairface Podcast Episode 3: What it's like to live with Rosacea
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What it's like to live with Rosacea: My personal journey living with Rosacea from the worst of times to the best of times. I share personal experiences, product recommendations & compassion from someone who “gets it”.
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Hi again and welcome back. Thanks so much for being here, it means a lot to have you join me.
As I was thinking about what to share next on this podcast, I was considering some different topics I could read up on or some skin care tips I could share but the thought kept coming back to me to keep it personal. To share what I know for myself.
So I decided today to share with you what it's like to live with Rosacea. Because it's something I know personally, and I thought maybe it might help you feel less alone if you have Rosacea or if you're dealing with your own sensitive skin issues, that you might feel less alone and can connect with somoene who kind of 'gets it' in my own way.
I shared in the first podcast episode a little about my skin journey and I'll go into it a bit more detail here.
I've always had sensitive skin.
I have fair skin that burns easily and my skin has always been allergic to metals. Like in middle school, I remember getting a rash on my stomach from the back of the metal button closure that held my jeans together.
And back when I was about 12 years old I got my ears pierced and my ear lobes went into total rebellion. I even cleaned the studs like I was supposed to, with the cotton balls and rubbing alcohol, but my ear holes got so infected that at one point my poor little ear lobes were so hard and scabbed all over. Yah, it was gross and painful and awful. So, over time, we tried earrings made of all the purest metals, but finally we concluded that I just could not wear metal earrings in my ears. So, the end. That was the end to that. So I was no stranger to skin sensitivities.
Fast forward a couple of decades beyond that and, I mentioned in my first podcast, that I was diagnosed with mild to moderate Rosacea about 11 years ago, and that was at the time my husband and I were going through Invitro fertilization in hopes of having a baby. So you can imagine what a really stressful and emotional time that already was.
And then on top of the stress and hormone shots and doctors appointments and all of that, my face started acting up - in a way that had never happened before.
It was so strange - my face would get hot, sometimes it would get hot on just one side of my face and then before long, it would just start to feel itchy and I knew that itchy welts and bumps were just going to start appearing on my face at any minute. And the itching, if you know Rosacea, the itching, just feels so bad you just want to tear your face off sometimes. And I admit, that I shouldn't have, but I would give in sometimes and I would scratch it just a little bit and of course then the irritation would spread and it would make it worse.
I remember once sitting in church and I could feel my face getting hot on one side, and pretty soon I started feeling that awful familiar tickling/itching sensation under my skin. I just wanted to cry.
So I secretly reached down in my purse to try to grab this little pocket mirror that I seriously carried everywhere now, and tried to angle it so that nobody could see that I'm looking at myself, hello, embarrassing, but "secretly" I was trying to get a glimpse of my face, just praying that I wasn't going to see what I thought was already going to be there - a red welt forming on my face where that itchy spot started. Because that was the cycle for me. My skin would get hot, it would start to get itchy and then red welts would form and then I knew I was doomed.
In my awkward angle, I could see my worst fears becoming a reality, there it was, big old red welt in the middle of church, and I tried to quietly kind of slide out and and get to the bathroom mirror as quick as I could. And I remember standing there looking in the mirror and all I could see was this big red welty spot that was spreading across my fair skin and not only that, but my face felt so hot on that side that I swear that it started looking purple. And I kept feeling my hand against my face. Is it really hot or am I just making this up? Does it really look purple? Can I cover it up with concealer? Will people be able to tell? Is someone going to come in the bathroom while I'm having a moment? Uh, it was so awful. And honestly sometimes I would leave church early because I was embarrased and I just knew, in my head, that everyone could tell my face was awkwardly red on one side or that the giant welt on my cheek that I had caked extra covered up on was as blaringly obvious as I thought it was.
I tried everything I could think of. I tried to drink more water. I took Ibuprophen. I wondered if it was food allergies?
But because of all this distress, I became hyper aware of my skin. So I would carry that small mirror in my purse and an extra one in my jacket pocket. I carried extra make-up coverup and a make-up sponge just in case. If my hair brushed against my cheek and tickled it, I would immediately need to look in the mirror and see if another red welt was forming. If a room was too warm and my face started flushing I would feel hyper that my face was going to start to itch and break out. It made me afraid of going to events with people for fear my face would act up and I wouldn't be able to hide it or fix it and I would be humiliated.
I just became hyper aware and hyper fixated on my skin which lead to feeling insecure and feeling that people were judging me. It's just such a vicious cycle.
And then at night I would try to scrub my face to get it clean thinking that if I scrubbed harder that it would, "get off the bacteria" or whatever was happening to my face, so looking back it was just really hard.
So at this point you can imagine that I was pretty desparate to figure out what was going on with my skin and so as I tried to find a Dermatologist (because I'd never been to one and at the time I was in my early 30's), but of course I also turned to Dr. Google (yah, who doesn't, right?) and after typing in my symptoms, it became pretty obvious I had Rosacea but I wanted to make sure to get into the Dermatologist.
So by the time I got in to see him, I wasn't suprised to hear that I did have mild to moderate Rosacea and he prescribed me Metro Gel to clear up my skin. Which, if you don't know what that is it's like a low dose antibiotic topical gel, and this was awesome because it totally worked for me, and it was able to take the itch away and the redness and the itchy bumps and it cleared it up...I don't remember how long it took, it didn't seem to take that long though for me to tell my skin was calming down so that was great. But as I mentioned in the first episode, it was a kick in the shorts because even with our insurance, just that one tube of medicine cost $85.00, which at the time was a huge unexpected expense, with all of the other invitro expenses.
Now I had a diagnosis, and I had a topical medication, but he hadn't told me how to take care of my skin, really, once I walked out of his office. So I knew that my routine had to change and the products that I used had to change, but I was pretty much left on my own to figure that out.
But sometimes, as they say, the best ideas come out of necessity and hardship and that's exactly what happened to me. Little did I know that I was in the beginning steps of creating the first Fairface Washcloths - with soft fabrics to ease my own skin's irriration and finally calm my skin down. And have something gentle enough that I could wash my face with that didn't just keep re-irritating my skin.
I think the first cleanser I found, over the counter, was the Rosacea...I think it was Eucerin Redness Relief, the one that has the gel that has licorice extract in it - it's a really cool gel, that cools your face. Anyway, I really loved it at the time. And I'm not sure which brand of moisturizer I started using, I'm guessing it may have also been Eucerin because I also used (and still use) Eucerin's Daily SPF 30 on my face.
Today my skin is doing amazingly well and it's clear the majority of the time, unless I drink pop - which pop, for me, is a total Rosacea trigger. I can count on having an itchy flare just really soon after drinking it - and, you know, sometimes I can't help myself, that Henry Weinhard's Root Beer or cream soda - those are my favorite, so sometimes I have a hard time turning that down but really I try not to drink pop very often for that reason. I also find if I take a nap and with my make-up on, after I wake up, my skin will start getting itchy and throw a bit of a fit, but for the most part if I stick to my skin care routine I have found that I really don't have problems with my skin, my Rosacea does not flare and it feels really good to have that consistency and reliability.
I keep my skin care routine pretty simple. You might know that I love Vanicream products - these were first recommended from a Dermatologist that I started seeing several years ago. I use Vanicream's gentle cleanser to wash my face, along with one of the soft Fairface Washcloths and I moisturize with Vanicream's lite lotion, and I do still use the Metro gel (the generic version of that) and my go-to sunscreen is Eucerin's Daily SPF 30, that I wear on my face every day.
There's also a few other products I like to use more on an as needed basis. I really like the Sarna Sensitive lotion (you have to make sure to get the sensitive version of that lotion or the regular Sarna lotion smells pretty medicated) but the Sarna Sensitive Lotion is a nice light lotion that is cooling on my skin and it's good for itchy skin. I also, on occasion, use Neutrogena's 2% acne spot treatment and Paula's Choice BHA9 for unwanted bumps. Neutrogena's oil free eye makeup remover, is one that I use every night just to take my mascara an eye liner off my eyes.
Now even though my skincare routine is pretty simple, I still consider myself having high maintenance skin. I'm not the girl who can just roll out of bed, throw on a baseball hat and head out for breakfast.
When my family gets together in the summer we love to go to small town garage sales and my 25-year-old neice can just roll out of bed, pop on a cowgirl hat and be on her way, looking gorgeous. She is the epitomy of #Iwokeuplikethis and she looks amazing. My version of #Iwokeuplikethis would have a wide-eyed emoji next to it that said, "no kidding". I don't look anywhere as good as she does. Not even close.
Sometimes it feels heavy that I have to pay so much attention to my skin and I can't just roll out of bed and look the way I want to look and not worry about having to wash my face, put on my topical meds, or get my moisturizer on and my sunscreen on and make-up on before I feel like I can go out and face people comfortably. But the truth is, I do have to take extra time to get ready - the facial redness and small broken capillaries on my cheeks from the Rosacea, do make me feel self-conscious and so I really don't feel comfortable going out without makeup on.
You know, another thing is, I have to be aware of the conditions I'll be in - will it be hot, will it be cold, will I have access to water, or shade or covered areas, will there be trigger foods served wherever I'm going, what is my emotional state (because getting flushed can cause flares for me).
I have to be prepared - you know, I have to consider how much time that I'll need to get ready in the morning or at night, and then determine how early do I have to get up, how do I need to dress - do I need to dress in layers so I don't overheat or get flushed, or do I need a scarf, or a hat, extra sunscreen, extra water?
I have to plan to have extra necessities sometimes, like when we travel, I do bring a set of my special Fairface washcloths for my face, I bring extra drying cloths, and I bring extra pillow cases - and I just have to say I really love Fisher's Finery silk pillow cases. Those are some of my favorites.
It can feel a little much at times, but it all comes down to the way we look at it, you know I just think attitude has everything to do with this. And I'm really lucky that I have found the products and skin care routines that have helped my skin and have kept it calm and clear, so if it takes this kind of special care, and time and attention then I just think it's worth it.
Well, that's all for this episode. I hope my honesty about my struggles with Rosacea have helped you. The journey I had going from really, the worst of times, to finding a successful way to manage and live with my Rosacea without problems. If you have any questions about anything that I've talked about or any of the products that I've used, please feel free to reach out to me. I'm pretty much an open book, so I'm happy to answer any questions you have. Thanks again so much for being here.
Thanks so much for reading the show notes for this episode of the Fairface Podcast! Please let us know what you think. Do you have any good product recommendations you'd like to share? Please let us know in the comments below.
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To shop our soft washcloths for Rosacea and sensitive skin go our FairfaceWashcloths website or Fairface Washcloths Etsy Shop.
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